International Sauna Rules
2007-02-01 22:21 | Posted by Ashrita Furman | Permanent Link | General
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During the three weeks I spent in Bulgaria recently, I got into the daily habit of taking a dip in the freezing cold Black Sea. I mainly did it just for fun, but the cold water seemed to help my muscles recover from my heavy training workouts. I would usually be accompanied by one or two friends and we never got tired of the thrill of that initial plunge from the beach into the icy sea. Each time we went in we would try to stay in the water a little longer. Sometimes, after being immersed for a couple of minutes, we would have conversations which might baffle a bystander:
Ashrita: Hey, Udar, that’s kind of weird, my toes just went completely numb.
Udar: That’s nothing. My toes went numb 30 seconds ago.
Ashrita: Wow! Guess what - I just starting getting these shooting pains up and down my arms.
Udar: Hey, that’s cool. Now I’m getting like this burning feeling on my back, but you know, if you keep your hands stuck in your armpits it keeps your fingers from freezing.
Afterwards, we would usually hop into the hotel sauna to thaw out. This became a regular routine, but on one particular day there was an unusual incident. Udar and a couple of other friends were already in the sauna and they were having a heated discussion (pardon the pun!) with an Austrian who was also a guest in the hotel. The fellow claimed that our group wasn’t abiding by the international rules of the sauna such as always bringing in a towel and not putting any water on the hot rocks. Now, I can understand the towel rule (are there really international sauna rules?), even though I always wear a bathing suit, but not putting water on the rocks just can’t be right. As a matter of fact, the hotel itself provides a bucket and a ladle in the sauna for that exact purpose. Ladling water onto the rocks creates steam and humidity and, as long as it’s done in moderation (two or three ladlefuls), the extra heat feels fantastic.
Anyway, I walked into the sauna in the middle of this discussion. Unfortunately, I didn’t have a towel and, according to my friends, it caused the Austrian to simply go ballistic. All I saw was this middle-aged gentleman get up, pour an entire bucket of water on the aforementioned rocks, and sit back down. There was a great deal of steam and sizzle and blazing heat. Being a novice sauna-goer, I thought this was a normal occurrence. I began making comments to Udar and it felt like our Black Sea chit chat all over again:
Ashrita: Hey Udar, this is amazing. It’s so hot in here that the tips of my ears feel like they’re on fire.
Udar (who had his head buried in his hands): Yeah, not just my ears, but my whole face is burning up.
Ashrita: I know, it’s neat, isn’t it. It hurts even to breathe!
My friends later told me that they were sure that the agitated Austrian had intended to drive us all out of the sauna with his impulsive act. But when I innocently took the results as a game, it must have totally freaked the poor fellow out. Within 20 seconds, he stormed out of the sauna, undone by his own anger!
Afterwards, all of us talked about the incident and we seemed to recall that, according to international sauna rules, the Austrian couldn't be allowed to return to the sauna until he gave every one of us a giant ice cream sundae with chocolate sauce and a cherry on top!
